The Craven Tummy Bomb

The following is the recipe for the patented, trademarked, copyrighted CRAVEN TUMMY BOMB:
1- Cook one pound of bacon. You actually only use about four slices, the rest is to munch on while you are cooking.
2- Take two 1/4 pound (or more if you think you are tough) chunks of sausage (I recommend Jimmy Dean sage flavor) and press each into patties as thin as you can. Place one in a frying pan and fold edges up to make a shallow bowl.
3- Place cooked bacon into the sausage bowl.
4- Crack one or two eggs (again depending on your perception of your manliness or womanliness) into the sausage bowl over the bacon.
5- Place the second sausage patty on top and pinch edges thoroughly to ensure a tight seal and no egg leakage.
6- Cook on low heat as the whole patty is now a couple of inches thick. Do not try to flip it until the egg in the middle has began to firm up.
7- While it is cooking, prepare the scone batter. You should have your own recipe for this or you can find one pretty easily on the internet. Any liquidy, frying batter will do. note: thicker batter will give you a thicker breaded finish, duh.
8- Flip and cook patty to desired doneness and brownness (I prefer a slight charred finish).
9- Remove patty from heat and blot the grease with a paper towel. I usually do not condone grease blotting, however, in this instance the grease prevents the batter from sticking to the sausage. An alternative is to let the patty sit for a minute and re- absorb the grease.
10- With tongs dip the whole patty into the scone batter and place into a pan of 377.5 degree oil, preferably oil that has been used to fry at least ten batches of french fries. It is best if the oil is deep enough to cover the whole sausage pod.
11- When the batter has cooked to the desired golden brown color, remove from the oil and place directly on a plate (no need for blotting this time).
12- Drizzle with hot maple syrup ( or sprinkle with powdered sugar if you prefer, or both) and serve.
*serves one.
*after personal tests the above TUMMY BOMB, consumed in its entirety by me, has had no adverse short term health effects and will soon be endorsed by the FDA.
**warning: not for cry babies or little girls.
This holiday recipe has been brought to you by Nathan Craven, Bon Apetit, er, I mean Good Eatin'.